Breath of the Spirit Reflection: Coming Out and Carrying Our Cross

September 7, 2021

Maggie Annkel

Breath of the Spirit is our electronic spiritual and liturgical resource for our members and potential members. Nothing can replace your chapter or other faith community but we hope you will find further support here for integrating your spirituality with your sexuality and all the strands of your life. <a href=https://www.dignityusa.org/civicrm/mailing/subscribe>Get Breath of the Spirit scripture reflections in your inbox every week</a>.<div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>Today Jesus invites us to carry our cross and follow. But what does that mean? In Isaiahs example it seems to be speaking the prophetic message that God gives despite condemnation and hardship. For James carrying ones cross is about working for the good of our sisters and brothers. Perhaps though these need not be two separate actions. Can we speak our truth that is to say come out with our truth not only as an affirmation of who we are but also as an act of generosity toward others? Jesus not only proclaims a Messiah who will suffer for others but also acts in accord with those words. Can we too allow our search for authenticity to lead us to a commitment to generosity? Only then do we lose our lives for Jesus sake and that of the gospel and save (that is find) ourselves in the process. </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>- - - - - - - - - -  </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>September 12 2021: the 24th Sunday in Ordinary Time </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>Isaiah 50:5-9a       Psalm 116:1-2 3-4 5-6 8-9 </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>James 2:14-18 </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>Mark 8:27-35 </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>A reflection by Jeff Vomund </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>There is that moment always when talking to someone on the street or a new associate or an unfamiliar colleague at work. They ask something like So are you married?; or the less committal Are you with anyone?; perhaps even the innocuous sounding What are you doing this weekend?. And I am confronted with the opportunity ready or not to come out.  </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>There begins my all-too-familiar calculus: How much do I tell? Is coming out now worth the trouble? Do I have the emotional energy in the case of a negative reaction? Am I able to speak of myself the way that every heterosexual cisgender person just assumes is their right?  For instance My wife and I will probably just do some chores around the house. These can be the most mundane words in the world if spoken by a man. Those same words can take considerably more courage  and cause considerably consternation if spoken by a woman. </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>I thought of those myriad moments which offer people who are LGBTQ+ an opportunity for integrity and awkwardness that people in a majority culture may not even notice when I read Isaiahs bold proclamation in todays first reading. Isaiah writes I have not turned back. I gave my back to those who beat me my face I did not shield from buffets and spitting. God is my help therefore I am not disgraced; I have set my face like flint knowing that I shall not be put to shame. For most people Whatcha doing this weekend? is idle small talk but for persons who have been minoritized due to our sexuality these opportunities for integrity can be anything but throw-away lines. In fact depending upon how habitually someone comes out (For me coming out remains a never-ending not always welcome not always successful process.) and the social context of the question our honest answers to seemingly innocent questions can too often get stuck in our throats.  </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>We see that same kind of courage in the gospel today. Surely Jesus teaching that the Messiah must suffer stuck in his throat at least for a moment he had to know that this announcement would not be well-received. But Jesus holds fast to this self-understanding despite the cool reception. (It seems fitting that Peter often seen as the first leader of the Church is the one to inform Jesus that he misunderstands Gods call. The Church has been offering LGBTQ+ folks that same rebuke for decades!) Jesus articulates this self-understanding  this God-given orientation if you will and then has the patience and stamina to engage in conversation when others think they know better. As such this vignette offers all people of faith a model for authenticity. All of us live in the process of coming out as who we are. We come out with our political and theological beliefs. We come out with our understandings about the best way to raise our children care for our parents live safely in the age of COVID. We often think of coming out as referring to sexuality but every one of us is called to come out as our true and best selves even when that is difficult or misunderstood or even derided. Jesus gives an example of the coming out courage all of us need if we are going to live in integrity  although let me suggest that Jesus strategy of calling those with whom we disagree Satan probably does not to deeper discourse.  If you dont believe me tune into any Cable News discussion! </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>While Jesus and Isaiah invite each of us to trust in and deliver the truths that God places within us the author of James offers an important perspective lest we get too focused on our own individual authenticity. The author suggests that proclaiming our truth is a necessary but insufficient step in ones journey toward discipleship. The author declares that faith proclaimed but not practiced is not faith at all. Instead authenticity must lead to generosity. What good is it if someone has faith but does not have works? asks the Epistle. What good indeed are our protestations against the human costs of our war in Afghanistan our outrage at human-caused global warming our strong feelings against the sicknesses that cause human trafficking if our lives do not work to mitigate their bad effects? What good are our protests that that people of all sexual and gender identities are fully human if we deliver that message in a way that dehumanizes others? Jesus referred to those whose verbal calls for authenticity far surpassed their actual efforts for justice as white-washed tombs (Matthew 23:27-28).  </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>I would like to say that Jesus foray into name-calling does not apply to me but that would of course be untrue. My personal authenticity often falls short of my willingness to sacrifice for a larger community. I choose not to take up my cross and follow as Jesus exhorts us in todays gospel. My intentions to act against climate change fall prey to my addiction to convenience. My desire to act on behalf of some of my sisters and brothers who are in great need (persons who are refugees homeless victims of wildfires or hurricanes these days we can take our pick) give way to the demands of daily life. Even at times my commitment to coming out falters because I simply feel too tired to risk investing in that moment.  </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556>Todays gospel passage ends with Jesus noting that we must lose our lives in order to save them but I take consolation that this too is a process. In fact I would like to suggest that coming out is in fact part and parcel of the losing ourselves for the sake of the gospel that discipleship requires. At first one comes out primarily to strengthen their own identity but over the years that same coming out can transition into an act of generosity for others. I share who I am who I love what I believe not to reaffirm myself so much as in the hope that in others getting to know me as a colleague teacher or neighbor they might be invited to hold their own beliefs with gentler hands. Also I trust that when others come out to me with their own story I too might be challenged to hold my prejudices less tightly. Over and again we encounter opportunities to both share truths about ourselves as well as act from those truths for the good of our one human family. Ultimately perhaps we are never so much ourselves as when we come out and act on behalf of our common humanity: an expression of that God-given identity that has been forming within us from the moment we came into being.- </div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556> <img src='https://www.dignityusa.org/sites/default/files/jeff_0.png'></div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556> Jeff Vomund is a member of Dignity/Washington and currently lives in Arlington VA. After 15+ years of full-time parish ministry and 7 years of teaching students with particular learning needs Jeff now works at George Mason University as a Graduate Research Assistant and a Graduate Lecturer while pursuing a Ph.D. in Educational Psychology.<a href=https://www.dignityusa.org/civicrm/mailing/subscribe>Get Breath of the Spirit scripture reflections in your inbox every week</a></div><div class=OutlineElement Ltr BCX0 SCXW183022556> </div>

Breath of the Spirit Reflection: Coming Out and Carrying Our Cross

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